Gi-ne (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
meatery) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
desertisland2015-09-04 01:31 pm
meatery) wrote in desertisland2015-09-04 01:31 pm
TL;CR Meme
Relationships Meme
Let me tell you about our CR
How to:
♥ Comment with your character ♥
♥ Reply to other people's characters demanding their thoughts on your character ♥
♥ Ramble on and on about your character's relationship with the other character, whatever that may be. Explain why they stabbed that dude, why they didn't stab that dude, would they stab that dude, etc. ♥
☂ Cry, probably, at some point. ☂
kashuu kiyomitsu
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ugh orca i'm laughing. so kashuu just sort of starts off with everyone on the same level, but that level is actually pretty high and positive? he's basically a "i'll like someone until they give me a reason not to like them" kind of person and ORCA IS NO EXCEPTION, that's what happened... he liked orca for a while in a "that guy's nice and let me do his hair" kind of way. the only real bump was when he voted for yamato, and kashuu was honestly assblasted about everyone who voted for yamato, but even then it wasn't an anger that was directly for orca. it was a blanket anger, like "wow everyone who voted yamato off clearly just wanted to kill more swords THAT'S RACIST" etc, etc... orca got swept up in there...
but he was mostly a non-entity until he got his ass kasinned LMFAO. kashuu considered that a split burden even though he died before he could really get on a murder roll, so he felt bad that orca was a victim to his crazy crazy partner in crime. NOT TOO BAD, MIND... and not really bad for the right reasons since he was mostly like "oh shit we might heck things up for the rest of the swords" BUT since orca was never really on his bad side he was like "that sucks and i am sorry for u" LMFAO.
AND THEN THEIR GRAVEYARD SCREAMING PARTY........ look i know you joked about it but literally kashuu bonded with him in that moment. orca had just been kind of this aloof vaguely pleasant guy before then but when they were both screaming and holding hands he felt some understanding there okay, TRUE UNDERSTANDING. understanding that they were both frantic idiots... honestly... and then he got to do orca's hair again SO THAT WAS NICE. basically he considered orca an okay dude through the whole course of the game and came out on the other end still thinking orca was an okay dude who screams and gets nervous with him which is always fun. he'd struggle to believe that orca is an antagonist in his canon...
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ugh pearl. PEARL PEARLSON. kashuu was sort of drawn to her immediately bc that frantic energy is like a signal to him. A HOMING BEACON FOR KASHUUS that says "come here and help, someone is in need of chilling out!!!" and so he followed his heart and tried to get pearl to chill out and sit down which worked out so well...... he sure tried...
he didn't really talk to or think much about pearl after that for a little bc they were in different circles for a while, but yams took to her and bc of that, kashuu kind of kept her in his periphery the entire time! he wanted to look out for the people yamato liked, too. and then yeah, the common ground with them both being people that weren't really people properly, not human but something not quite inhuman either. it was nice having other people like that on the island, and kashuu kind of started sticking to her after this us vs swords sentiment started to pick up bc he knew that pearl would be able to understand their side. it was nice having that understanding, and he wanted to provide it in turn! he wanted to make sure that pearl knew she wasn't alone on the island, basically, and that she could turn to them if she ever needed anything.
AND THEN she stood with them even when the majority of the vote went to yamato and that honestly meant so, so much to him. he was furious with everyone who voted for yams that trial and, by the flip side of the same token, he felt really merciful toward anyone who didn't vote for him even if it wasn't enough to turn the tide of the trial. that was basically the moment that he started to view pearl as a comrade too, bc she stood up for one of their own, so BASICALLY SHE WAS INITIATED INTO THE DANGEROUS SWORD GANG. GOOD WORK, PEARL.....
so kashuu wanted to help her out bc she helped them out, bc yams liked her a lot, and bc he had genuinely grown to like her too! she was acting as a support to him when he honestly felt extremely isolated and alone, especially when she promised to ally her votes, so he wanted to do his best to provide that in return, which is why he made sure to reassure her as often as possible and to try cheering her up and just being there for her. pearl was actually one of two people that kashuu had absolutely no intention of ever killing (the other being clarine hilariously OOPS), so he meant it when he said everything would turn out fine in that last convo! TSURU MADE HIM BREAK HIS PROMISE!! but he would have absolutely done everything he could to ensure pearls safe return.
he felt aaawful about pearl being kasinned, too... LMFAO. bc he wanted split responsibility even tho kasen did most of the killing, since he knew he'd have been right there with kasen if he hadn't died first. he was actually kind of surprised by pearl's reaction but it eventually made sense to him too, bc he understood that they were on the same wavelength with a lot of things. so it meant a lot to him that she didn't shun him or that she didn't condemn what he was doing even tho it was by all means a condemnable act. SHE UNDERSTOOD and she was even worried about the corruption thing, so he was just, ugh. his heart... his soft heart... PEARL MADE IT RIGHT TO THE CENTER.
pearl's another one of the main reasons he's considering keeping her memory, bc he'd be walking away with a looot of bad things, but he honestly came to be really, really fond of pearl. she's absolutely one of his favs on the island and he wants to be able to keep her in his thoughts even if they can't ever see each other again and even if he'll miss her a lot! WHICH HE WILL. pearl is one of the people he wishes most that he had more time to get to know, so it's this confusing mishmash of "i like you a lot and you're a good friend but i regret not being able to meet you in a better place and i'm sorry i couldn't be my best self here and i'm gonna miss you" basically. HE WISHES HE COULD HAVE DONE BETTER he wishes he got to know pearl under better circumstances, but he's grateful he had the chance to meet her at all. PEARLS #1 FAN TBH or maybe sharing the title with yams
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ugh okay im laughing really hard i never actually said this to anyone but christy but... at the start of the game, souza was the sword kashuu was most wary of.... LMFAO. BUT that lasted all of .5 seconds bc then sephiroth turned on souza and kashuu's innate instinct to Protect All Comrades kicked in, and from that moment on, kashuu was basically like (holds souza) no one touch him.
kashuu obviously isn't super close to souza back at the citadel bc they run in different circles and they don't really have a whole lot in common, and i think that kind of stuck for a little while in the game too. like he LEAPED ANGRILY TO SOUZA'S DEFENSE and then he kind of made it his job to make sure souza was okay after that (don't just lie down and die souza wtf!!!!!), but he didn't really feel super close to souza either. HE WAS JUST ANOTHER SWORD COMRADE TO BABYSIT... gotta make sure he eats his squished dinner rolls!! souza was always sort of in his line of sight tho, bc he knew souza was one of the swords at most immediate risk since sepiroth called him out and was so sure of himself. IT WAS AWFUL...
but then souza kind of dropped off his radar for a little, bc he was more focused on the triple whammy of shijima-horikawa-yamato. AND THEN THE CONVO HE HAD WITH SOUZA WASN'T REALLY GREAT... LMFAO kashuu "do humans suck?" souza "yes". THANKS SOUZA. but he actually did kind of appreciate what souza was saying even tho the overall message was just not inspiring or great for human/sword relations. it made him feel closer to souza! that conversation was basically bumping souza up into "swords that i really seriously care about" status, and then the pinky promise, AND THEN HIS ASS GETS MURDERED....... and after souza showed up dead, kasen and kashuu decided to Kill, so. souza: the catalyst.
after his ass died too, he grew to appreciate souza even more! his support in the graveyard meant a lot, bc souza understood where his fears were, and why he did what he did, and there was no judgment or scorn ONLY ACCEPTANCE AND COMFORT and he was just so glad to see souza souzason aliveish again and doing... okay... as okay as souza ever is. he kind of stuck to souza after that point and probably tailed him around the gy a little when he wasn't busy with the other gumi swords. SOUZA!! his heart was really soft for souza okay he grew very fond of him and grateful for his weird souza brand of support.
AND THEN UGH THEIR FINAL POST CONVO...... SOUZA SERIOUSLY JUST PUNCHED HIM RIGHT IN THE ENDEARMENT DOKIS. what the fuck!!! he was so endeared!! souza talking about wanting to spend more time with friends and that he wouldn't be turned away meant so much to him and he just got super embarrassing bc he has no self-control, but it really meant a lot, A WHOLE LOT. hilariously i think souza is one of the swords that kashuu had the biggest change of feelings toward, bc he came in already being really close to most of the other swords but SOUZA!! starts out being vaguely suspicious of the quiet hard-to-read sword, ends up just wanting to pet his dumb flamingo head all day and make sure he never gets hurt again. he'd punch auger for u if he knew about the Trials You Faced, souza. he'd do it. IN THE MEANTIME souza is the catalyst that got him thinking abt keeping his memories so he can make sure he'll be there for him in the future bc he wants to be! bc COMRADES!!! etc. kashuu has a gross big heart and souza's right there in it now.
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im laughing ok tsuru was actually a nonentity to kashuu for the first half of the game! as in, he was in the same category that most of the other swords fell under without doing much to stand out one way or another. "I CARE ABOUT YOU A LOT BC WE'RE COMRADES but i don't actually know a lot about you". they were comrades but not friends, as he'd said! but the thing with kashuu is, his comrades mean the world to him. he's a very trusting and loyal sword, and regardless of whether or not he personally likes or gets along with any of the other swords, he'd still risk himself to make sure they're okay.
and he actually likes tsuru SO... as someone whos dealt with yamato for so long and who had a pretty bloodthirsty master, tsuru's bloodthirst doesn't (usually) bother him. he also felt bad for him about his weird complex re: being cursed and death following him around (which is why that was literally the first thing he honed in on when he wanted to hurt tsuru HE'S AN ASSHOLE HONESTLY LMFAO) to the point that his initial draft death letter had a little section in it where he was telling tsurumaru to stop being a moron abt curses and that he was fine and he'd be okay. he understands loneliness so he never hesitated to try dragging tsuru back into the group or at least to hang around him like he did when they went fishing, even with the whole ~death stigma~ LOOK HE'S GOT ONE TOO IT'S FINE THEY'RE FINE.
BUT THEN THEY WEREN'T FINE... OOPS. tsuru was actually one of the swords that kind of pushed kashuu toward Team Chaotic Chaotic and he kind of thought later on that it might have been on purpose but tsuru isn't auger... but the conversation they had after yam's execution just made him feel like he was justified in this belief that they were being persecuted by The Whole Island and then souza turned up dead the next day and he was like "bye felicia" and went turbo. HONESTLY tsuru did him a favor by taking him out so early or he'd have joined kasen in his murder rampage, which was the plan - he actually had no intention of finding tsuru despite the fact that he told two people he'd talk to him and believed he was the traitor by then, bc he wanted to save killing tsuru for last... basically..... LMFAO.
AND THEN MURDERNIGHT oh boy. obviously kashuu was Not Doing Well by that point and tsuru just sort of... i don't want to say made him snap bc lbr he'd already snapped by then, but he nudged kashuu from this ":))) everything's fiiine!! (stabs people)" insanity to a True Despair Insanity. he was so hurt and so angry for his own sake and for horikawas sake and for yamato and kasen and every other fallen sword, and he was furious bc tsuru was making him break so many promises which is why he got vicious. HE'S A LOYAL SWORD so betrayal cuts deep, and since this was just sort of one awful thing after another which each thing getting worse than the next, he couldn't cope. hilariously, he actually realized later that tsuru kind of went easy on him... like he didn't actually ever hit any of kashuu's obvious buttons. he mentioned the ikedaya break to a couple of people but never brought it up to kashuu directly, that kind of stuff. OBVIOUSLY HE KNEW WHERE TO HIT IF HE WANTED TO but he didn't, and kashuu doesn't know if that was intentional or not but he was kind of thinking back on it like tsuru: YOU'RE A FOOL FOR BEING SO TRUSTING, kashuu: LIVE FOREVER AND SUFFER FOR AN ETERNITY like... HE LOST HIS TEMPER OKAY........ he had a moment...
he was still having a moment in the gy which is why he stepped on tsuru and then kicked him, bc he actually entirely felt sympathetic toward the killers! clarine and gi-ne were his favs! it wasn't even really betrayal in the end bc tsuru was doing what he did for everyone else, even if he also had some selfish reasonings. the thing that he was still mad abt was the way tsuru tackled it, bc he just couldn't comprehend why he'd hurt hori so bad or say all of the cruel things he did. OR RATHER..... he could comprehend it, but the part of himself that could is the ugly part he ignores. if he really thought about it he might wonder more abt tsuru's reasons, bc he's had moments where he's wanted to just hurt others out of envy or bc of a lack of understanding and a desire to understand AND IT'S TERRIBLE AND UGLY but he gets it, and that's probably part of why he went easy on tsuru.
especially after they actually started talking in the gy! he's a young sword, comparatively, but he does absolutely understand the stigma of death and what it's like to be isolated and alone. he understands that he'd do the same thing in tsuru's situation bc losing his comrades is just not an option (AS SEEN.......) since he 100% meant it when he said he'd do anything to keep them. christy and i had many great chats abt endgame where the swords domino-corrupt... it was a Real Fear for kashuu and kasen HAHAHA but he did walk away from that feeling less angry and more understanding. he's still like ???? about tsuru a little but the mutual understanding (more or less) on a pretty dark and damaging subject made him basically nod and be like "okay. you're a shit, but i get it". AND LIKE HE SAID his comrades mean the world to him, and like tsuru said, kashuu is Really Trusting, so in the end he wouldn't abandon tsuru even after everything he did. it'll take a while to heal but tsuru is still a precious comrade!! he'll probably try to get to know him better if he keeps his memories bc #lonelydeathswords
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okay kashuu obviously has a lot of Feelings about souji bc even though he tries really hard to pretend he's aloof and distanced from his past, he's not!! he's not at all... he's just as bad about it as yamato is, honestly, he just doesn't wave it around for everyone to see. so meeting an okita in the game was honestly kind of distressing to him! like, on one hand he was really happy bc he knew he'd never get another chance to really talk to okita again, but on the other, he was like i'm trying to leave this behind why is this happening.
AND THEN SOUJI STILL HAD HIS BROKEN BLADE WITH HIM and that rattled kashuu really badly. the only reason it didn't become a bigger thing to him is because there were other, more pressing issues at hand like trying to make sure his comrades made it out of the game safely! so he was able to put that aside so he could continue fighting. he never really talked to souji much bc he's still worried about the whole being hung up on the past thing and the potential of corruption or being tempted onto a path that would lead to corruption, but he was absolutely keeping an eye on him the entire game. ESPECIALLY AFTER HIS RANDOMIZED VOTE WENT TO SOUJI. he promised he'd never abstain again after that and he never did.
that said, actually kashuu was originally going to live long enough to see souji deda and bsod bc of it... LMFAO... BUT HE DIED FIRST INSTEAD so he was spared that extra trauma, and he was really sad to see souji in the graveyard (and also kind of felt like a failure bc what the fuck why can't anyone keep souji alive), but since he knew the truth by that point, he also knew it was better for souji to be down there with them. they could just relax and chill without worrying about dying night after night, and they finally knew the truth, so! it wasn't an all-loss situation. and he enjoyed being able to talk to souji more there, even tho the apology was totally out of left field and he didn't know how to handle it at all. it really meant a lot to him though, bc he obviously never got closure after being discarded so that was kind of like... i mean, it didn't pave over things completely, but it did soothe this really old wound he's been carrying.
AND THEN ENDGAME. kashuu is torn abt whether or not to keep his memories but souji is one of the main reasons he's leaning toward keeping them. he really treasures being able to see him again and actually talk to him this time, even if it wasn't the souji he remembers being wielded by! that was important and special to him, so he selfishly wants to hold onto that. his fear of eventual corruption is the only thing holding him back, really. so until he makes his decision he's just content to make the most out of their last 24 hours together. GONNA FEED THE BIRDS WITH FAV FORMER MASTER it's fine they're fine everything's fine it's not like he'll miss souji a whole lot or anything
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UNTIL MATT JUMPED ON THE YAMS BANDWAGON UGH!!! MATT WHY DID YOU PICK BETRAY. the thing with yamato and kashuu is they're Extremely Close, so losing yamato basically set kashuu on the "it's time to kill the rest of the island" path of destruction. fortunately he only managed to kill royce roycin before he died! UNFORTUNATELY KASIN WAS STILL AROUND but you win some, you lose some... he was also still salty abt matt to the point that he was angry when matt apologized bc he truly is a salty nut.
anyway, kashuu chilled out a whole lot in the graveyard after learning the truth and being able to see his dead sword friends again, so he got over his buttgrudge toward matt pretty quickly since he never really disliked matt personally. matt was honestly one of the nicest people about his tetchiness re: the swords in general, vocalizing his opinions on yamato aside, so kashuu went right back to being like "YOU'RE OKAY IN MY BOOKS" after he stopped being insane. UR AN OKAY HUMAN MATT MATTSON not bad at all, he's sorry you had such a bad time with all that manpain tho that seems like a bad time. anyway he also needs to make matt a pretty princess before they leave the island. IT'S TIME
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and then his attention just sort of shifted away from gi-ne for a while because THE THING IS... the generals were never the biggest threat to the swords LMFAO. THEY ONLY KILLED ONE SWORD, and kashuu was extremely, extremely aware of that especially after yamato's death. after a while, it wasn't "innocents vs generals" to him, it was "the rest of the island vs the swords" which honestly wasn't unreasonable considering literally every party on the island had a fair number of people in it that wanted the swords dead regardless of their alignment, and there wasn't really a whole lot of remorse outside of swordgroup for the swords which kashuu picked up on bc he's sensitive to things like that! SO the generals were kind of a non-entity to him, because his goal wasn't to kill them... it was to wipe out the rest of the island so that his brothers would be able to make it....... bye his sanity.
he was actually working with kasen during gi-ne's trial to keep attention on her too LMAO LIKE kasen was doing it more directly but every time someone started to look at any other body outside of jason, kashuu would redirect them back. BUT HE STILL DIDN'T HAVE ANYTHING AGAINST GI-NE bc despite the "kill everyone" mentality, gi-ne hadn't done anything to him personally... AND THEN SHE HAD HER KILLER SPEECH AND HE HAD A MOMENT WHICH IS HILARIOUS because he's actually pretty good at reading emotion in other people when it matters, so if he hadn't been so insane, he 100% would have noticed that something was running way deeper beneath the surface and that gi-ne wasn't just this cold remorseless killer. especially because, as your brackets mentioned, he's a sword! he gets it, having to do bad things sometimes for the greater good... BUT he was really far gone at that point so everything went over his head and then he cried on pearl about it later and then went off to kill people LMFAO.
AND THEN SHE DIED and then he died and she was so sweet to him in the graveyard... like, he really needed that after everything, and he was super wary at first bc tsuru said some shit but in the end he's a trusting moron and he accepted her peace nut offering bc he liked gi-ne at the start and he didn't really want to look for a reason to keep being mad at her! he would much rather have been her friend than an enemy, so he took the chance she kindly provided. he understood what she was fighting for and he honestly admired her for it... gi-ne and clarine are basically his fav killers even if he didn't really have a lot of time to bond with gi-ne. HE WAS GLAD HE GOT TO EAT SNACKS WITH HER AND GIVE HER A HUG AND HELP HER BE OPTIMISTIC and scream "KILL" at the tv with her over urashima murdering a shitcat...... #bonding I STILL NEED TO TAG HER ON THE FINAL MINGLE but yes thats about the sum of it! gi-ne: a great monkey murder mom that he liked and then ended up admiring from afar, A++ really sweet would befriend again under better circumstances
Re: kashuu kiyomitsu
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sweet innocent weenie murder cru clarine... kashuu liked her right from the start and by the end of the game, she was still one of his fav people on the island! she had similar priorities, and he could see right through her tsun to the soft moe center okay. HE WAS INSTANTLY ENDEARED!! he wanted to do everything he could to make things better for her! he takes to people really quickly and he took to clarine even quicker than usual bc she seemed really sure of herself but he could also kind of tell that she was less certain than she seemed? he has similar coping mechanisms, so THAT'S PROBABLY WHY.
BUT YES he tried to do his best to be there for her, to cheer her up and stuff!! he'd meet with her and talk about things that had nothing to do with murder, reassure her when it looked like she was having a bad time, etc. since he's a sword, he was better equipped re: dealing with (most of) the deaths so he tried to use that to his advantage to kind of give clarine a space where she could just worry about herself without having to worry about anyone else. he really liked talking to her about her homeworld and talking about his in turn, and making shopping promises, etc. silly stuff, but it meant a lot!
AND THEN THE SWORDS STARTED DYING. horikawa was really rough but honestly, the tipping point for him was yamato. bc at least with horikawa, they could kind of be like "well yeah it's the generals and they're killing everybody!" but to kashuu, the eagerness of the village to lynch yamato just sort of drove home this underlying fear he'd had since souza's trial that the swords were viewed as "other". AND IT WAS PRETTY LEGIT but it was also kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy on both ends. the harder the village pushed, the worse the swords got, etc. so after that kashuu just sort of snapped, even tho he looked back on the fact that clarine kept offering comfort and he was really grateful for it! and he felt bad that he didn't appreciate it at the time, but his partner had just been shot SO HE WAS HAVING A MOMENT...
and then he just kind of went full crazytrain LMFAO. kashuu was able to approach clarine after gi-ne's trial bc he was basically just nuts af already, totally resolved to following through with his murderplan, so he could act much calmer. LIKE I MENTIONED TO PEARL hilariously clarine is one of two people that kashuu had absolutely no intention of ever killing (pearl being the other) so rip, that would have worked out poorly. he did feel genuinely bad that clarine was the executioner bc he believed that was the first blood she'd drawn, and he knows how difficult it can be on humans to draw first blood, so he wanted to sort of remind her that he was still there for her even if he had drifted off for a little when he was being Despair Sword. AND THEN HE WENT AND DIED which was for the best honestly bc if he learned clarine was maf while he was still alive it would have just been a Not Good Moment.
but instead, he got to learn she was maf from the comfort of the graveyard, after learning abt what they were really fighting for. AND YEAH he felt kind of upset bc he wasn't sure how much of what she had said or done was an act (tsuru didn't help with his impressions of the maf ok), and she had known yamato was innocent despite not voting for him (which ended up actually meaning more to him after learning she knew he was innocent), but he liked her so much and he was so grateful that she was fighting for everyone that he didn't linger on it long. CLARINE WAS HIS FAV MAF hands down, and he admires her the most bc she's strong, but killing people just ???? ISNT HER THING, HE FIGURES... so she's strong but she's way out of her element and she still managed to make it through.
kasen intentionally didn't mention kashuu's involvement in his crazyass plot so that's actually the one reason he hasn't apologized to clarine yet, LMFAO... he's respecting kasen's kindness toward him. otherwise he would absolutely have been like "sorry for almost ruining everything with mass murder". LUCKILY CLARINE HASN'T MENTIONED IT EITHER so he's totally fine to just try moving on and enjoying their last 24 hours together. he's sad he won't be able to go shopping with her or tease her about urashima, and he's considering keeping his memories so he can still remember what a brave and wonderful and sweet person she had been even if he can't see her again!
SO YES brat with a heart of gold who turned out to be a fierce warrior princess that he likes a whole lot and really admires, 10/10 would have dumb sleepovers with where they can paint each others nails and rate the cuteness of poor unsuspecting bystanders
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OKAY WELL obviously there's all of the history b/w yams and kashuu from before the island. kashuu may act aloof and distant and like he doesn't care but yamato is hands down one of the swords that he cares about the absolute most. he'd sacrifice the most for yams, he fusses the most over yams, he just really cares for him!! bc they really are like a set of mirrors; yamato is his reflection, but he's more than that, too. for a sword as lonely as kashuu, who's always looking for more people to love and be loved by, yamato sort of became this piece of himself. it's not really the same as the sibling bond that some swords have, but it's definitely this closeness and understanding that he doesn't really share with anyone else.
so that's why he kind of took it upon himself to make sure yamato didn't DO ANYTHING STUPID... but at the same time, he couldn't really do a whole lot and that frustrated him to no end. he knew after sephiroth's trial that it might have come to a point where "doing everything he can" wouldn't be enough and that terrified him, so he busied himself with taking care of smaller things. he'd harass yams about getting enough to eat, make sure that his hair was done up nicely, asked him to be careful in the woods, refused to spend the nights with him in case he was picked as a target and yamato got caught up in it, etc. he pulled yamato aside to tell him to not be so suspicious earlier too because he was so afraid that the tide of opinion would turn against him if he was too weird WHICH TURNED OUT VERY TRUE... and honestly kashuu hated himself a little for saying that no one would like yamato if he acted weird, because even tho he gives yams a hard time himself, he loves him a lot! and he thinks other people should, too, bc yams is a good sword and a good person even if he's also a freak that carries around his boyfriends head. PLEASE DONT???
but yeah he'd do what he could for as long as he could, including the scarf swap, or just sitting with yamato after horikawa's body was discovered. he was already starting to unravel by that point but yamato gave him a tether, so to say, bc he was like "okay yams is having a much harder time so i need to be strong for him" AND HE TRIED HIS BEST. he really did, which is kind of why it hurt him when yams brought up his tendency to discard things. YAMS SAYS CUTTING THINGS HONESTLY some of the stuff he said hurt kashuu more than the stuff tsuru said bc yams knows where to hit LMFAO. and that's also why the one thing he regrets the most all game is letting go of yamato at the end of that trial.
yamato's death was hands down the most traumatic event kashuu went through all game, not only bc it was yamato but bc of the circumstances. he was so sure yamato was innocent and that he'd done nothing wrong and everyone was just so ready to vote him off even if they weren't sure just bc they thought he was dangerous, and that was just entirely damaging to kashuu. his faith in humanity took a huge hit then and that was when he started considering the option of just wiping out everyone else before they could take down the rest of the swords. the only reason he was able to handle things even halfway decently is because he tricked himself into thinking that they'd be okay as long as their vessels got back to the saniwa! so he watched yamato walk in front of a gun thinking that it'd be fine because they'd see each other again, but holy shit, there's nothing he regrets more than letting him go. he didn't really have time to focus on how lonely he was after that bc he redirected all of his attention toward Team Chaotic Chaotic and their Great Murder Plan, but it was definitely present and it absolutely would have consumed him if he didn't have a distraction.
THAT'S WHAT HE MEANT WHEN HE GOT TO THE GY BTW. when he said sorry for making you wait, he was actually referring to the gap of time between breaking at ikedaya and them meeting up again under the saniwa's command. he knows that it wasn't the same bc he barely even had to wait a few days, but he got a taste of the same kind of loneliness yamato had to deal with and even that was almost enough to destroy him. it was agonizing to him to know that yams had dealt with that on a much larger scale and for a longer period of time, with multiple people, but he knows it's not the kind of thing that can be apologized for either so instead he made a promise to stay by yamato's side for the rest of eternity basically. HE'S A SAP... but he meant it... he really would have gone straight to hell with yams if it had been allowed. SORRY TSURU promises to #1 swordbro come first.
but everything mostly worked out in the end! yams was okayish in the gy, his fuckin eternal deathwish aside, and kashuu was able to look out for him again and at least try to make some amends for any loneliness he'd caused in the past. it also really opened up his eyes to how much yams means to him, honestly. LIKE HE KNOWS YAMS MEANS A LOT OBVIOUSLY despite him being a big fat tsundere about it, but even he didn't know he'd completely fuckin lose his mind if yamato died... wtf... he's Attached. so yes basically enter game an irritated tsundere babysitter, leave game a traumatized but more appreciative babysitter.
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okay the funny thing about their final conversation tho is the fact that kashuu actually had absolutely zero intention of finding tsurumaru. SO I MEAN, HE WASN'T WRONG TO BE WARY ABOUT LIES. just, they weren't the lies he expected... because at that point, kashuu had already solidified his resolve and he was planning on going out and killing as many people as possible that night. tsuru just ended up finding him first, so it looked like he actually did go out to find him BUT NO. he was 100% focused on murder.
BUT for auger himself, he was a non-entity for kashuu! kind of a brat, irritating bc he didn't believe the swords were swords, but otherwise he didn't really register much. he probably would have been able to tell auger was bad news earlier if he had been focusing on that BUT HIS FOCUS WAS ELSEWHERE SO...... rip. auger literally flew under his radar the entire game LMFAO. AND NO ONE EVER TOLD HIM ANYTHING?! i saw souza and urashima talking about letting kashuu in on the info loop BUT NO, NO ONE EVER DID SO HE WENT INSANE AND KILLED PEOPLE INSTEAD LMFAO. he wasn't really ever mad at auger until souza talked about some of the stuff auger was responsible for, and even then he was only mad in a "WOW HOW DARE SOMEONE ROUGH UP MY FAM" kind of way that was quickly over when bigger threats happened. AND THEN AUGER ALMOST SENT THEM ALL TO HELL. he was glad auger died but also in a distant way, not in a "HAHA SERVES THAT GUY RIGHT" way but in a "THANK GOD NOW WE'RE SAFE" way.
all in all he doesn't really want to talk to auger again bc he's still kind of mad, but not mad enough to want to dampen his own mood over. kashuu still doesn't know the true depths of augers shittiness tho even if he knows more than urashima BUT THAT'S A GOOD THING... shitcats
Re: kashuu kiyomitsu
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kashuu honestly liked shijima a lot from the start and even i couldn't tell you why. HE JUST LIKES WHO HE LIKES FOR ARBITRARY REASONS... everyone starts off at a baseline of "i like you until i have a reason to stop liking you" and somehow shijima just raised to one of his favs within a day or two and i have no idea why. HE JUST FOUND HER ENDEARING... even with her prickly personality and her off-kilter comments but i mean, look at his sword friends, he's 100% used to things like that...
so he was happy to spend time with her and be able to do her hair for her and fish with her! and he felt a sort of kinship bc neither of them had human hearts to start with; they were an object and an animal respectively, and were given these huge burdens in the form of human emotions and thoughts. that's actually part of why he absolutely doesn't hold her deathwish against her... he's Old but he's also only been in his current form for a year or so, so even though he's older than shijima by technicalities, she's older than he is when it comes to knowing what it's like to live with a human heart. he probably looks back on their convo about what he does when dealing with loss like justin.gif too, honestly... LMFAO HE DIDN'T KNOW THEN BUT HE SURE KNOWS NOW he goes crazy and tries to kill a whole island, rip.
when shijima was revealed to be zaroff, that was kind of like the first really big impactful event to happen to him all game. he wasn't really affected by the other deaths and souza seemed out of the woods, so shijima having this role that could kill all of them was Upsetting bc he was like "I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIEEENDS". so he was mad abt that for a while... partially bc of direct betrayal but mostly bc she endangered his sword comrades which is no bueno. he also got over it pretty quickly too tho bc he really did still genuinely like her, and he believed her when she said she liked him too! he was trying to explain it to yamato at one point, actually, since he understood it pretty well once he calmed down. yams was like "SHE TRUSTED YOU RIGHT?" and kashuu was like "just bc she liked me, that doesnt mean she trusted me or that she wouldnt kill me" LMFAO. and he also did feel sympathy especially after he lost his goddamn mind, bc he couldn't even imagine being stuck in an endless cycle like she had been...
so he resolved himself to spoiling her as much as possible!! after he calmed his ass down, anyway. he took some time to regain his chill and then he was totally happy to spend his doubledeath just hanging out with shijima, braiding her hair, giving her ribbons, making sure her couch was okay etc... AND LORD ABOVE SHE REALLY DID ALMOST GIVE HIM A HEART ATTACK AT THE END. he was so scared that the judge would have made it so she died for real or something, which i mean, that would have been good for shijima at least... or that the judge would have made her next round even worse and it was just BAD, BAD NEWS. but shijima herself was incredible in that moment, since she was kind enough to deliver his message to kasen (even if it was inelegantly worded and kasen was too bsod to notice oops) and then she helped stop auger at the cost of her own life (even if she had cat reasons for it) SO HE WAS LIKE "SHIJIMA IS MY FAV I'LL FIGHT YOU ALL" who even cares abt the body mutilation, not him.
he really ended up being quite fond of her in the end bc he's a loser sap with a big mushy heart... she's one of the people he'll miss the most from the island, and he'll treasure the piece of amber she gave him forever bc >loser sap, etc. he's kind of happy for her in a melancholy-ish way, too! like he's really glad she and her brother are finally getting the release they want from life, but he's sad that she got to the point where that's her goal, basically. HE'LL MISS U CAT best cat good cat fav cat
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